small town Archives

Carly Woythaler-Runestad

By Asha Timperley

She wasn’t sure she wanted to share her story. Actually, she felt like she didn’t really have one. She says the people she works with, they have the “real” story.

As the executive director of the Mourning Hope Grief Center, Carly Woythaler-Runestad has seen and heard a lot of stories. She’s not a grief group facilitator and she doesn’t lead any of the sessions, but she is the one who’s responsible for keeping the lights on and the programs running at Mourning Hope.

It’s a job that she ‘fell’ into in many senses, but it’s become her greatest passion and something that’s helped her define her own story.

Carly grew up in a rural town in central Iowa. It was a small, community-focused place where she was surrounded by strong parents, impactful mentors and experienced a nurturing upbringing. This environment seemed to set the tone for Carly’s life.

She attended the University of Iowa and received her undergraduate degree before going on to work as a music therapist and then the director of a long-term care facility. Carly decided to return to school to earn her Master’s degree in health care administration and then put her degree to work as a lobbyist for the Nebraska Hospital Association.

Carly had several jobs after she graduated that she liked and was good at, but each one seemed more like stepping stones rather than a place to settle down and dig in. She felt like she was constantly searching for the right fit, and started to think maybe it didn’t exist.

She and her husband moved to Nebraska in 2004 and a few years later Carly’s life was shifted by major changes and transitions. Her mother was battling cancer, her grandparents died and she experienced a miscarriage – all of which happened in a relatively short period of time.

The sudden losses and change caused Carly to re-evaluate her story, to start thinking about who she was, what she wanted to do and who she wanted to be. She realized she wanted a job that she was excited to go to every day, a place where she could see the impact of her work and was more than just a way to utilize her skills and take home a paycheck.

It was during this period of transition that Carly came across the Mourning Hope Grief Center.

She started out as a part time employee who was interested in the center’s mission of helping kids and their caregivers navigate seasons of loss. Carly watched broken, unsure and scared kids and caregivers walk through the front door of Mourning Hope, only to see them leave with hope and excitement.

It’s work that’s nearly addictive because of the noticeable impact it has on families, and Carly said it didn’t take long before she stopped seeing Mourning Hope as a stepping stone to something bigger… it became her landing place.

The work got under her skin in the best way possible and opened her eyes to a population of the city and state that she hadn’t seen before. Mourning Hope’s mission became her mission as she dug in and found her place.

It’s heavy work, but Carly wouldn’t have it any other way. The stories of the kids and families from Mourning Hope seem to play on a continuous loop in her mind, motivating her to work harder, do more and send emails at nearly all hours of the day.

They are the reason she loves waking up and going to work.

They are the reason she’s worked to join local and national organizations to advocate for grieving children and families.

And they are the reason she’s an engaged wife and mother who values every minute with her family.

People often ask Carly if she experienced a significant loss that kick-started her passion, but that’s not why she joined the team at Mourning Hope. She joined because she discovered a deep desire to help others.

As she looks back on her educational and career path, Carly can see that caring well for others has been a theme in her jobs and her story. It’s part of who she is, and something she’s always valued, but working at Mourning Hope brought that to the surface.

Carly said that for so long it felt like she was searching for her story, for what was next and where she wanted to invest her energy and time. Now, ‘what’s next’ looks like staying put, raising her family and being diligent in her work.

She referenced the quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson that says: “To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”

That’s what she wants in life, to live her story well by helping shoulder the burdens of others. For the first time in a long time Carly isn’t looking for what’s next, it’s right in front of her, and her story has never seemed so clear.

August 23, 2017

Love3

Blaine Brown

By Asha Timperley

Blaine Brown grew up in a small town.

A town so small that his high school doesn’t even exist anymore, and Blaine said he has a few memories he wish didn’t exist either.

Blaine’s story is a mashup of challenging circumstances, tough choices and the redemptive power of hard work. It’s a story that Blaine said he wants to tell, because he said no one should ever let their past define their future.

As a kid, Blaine grew up living between homes. His parents divorced when he was in 4th grade and he and his siblings alternated between his mom, dad and various family members. His dad and brother were in and out of jail with drug and alcohol addictions and Blaine’s only constants in life were school and work.

At school, he was often made fun of for his hand-me-down clothes and messy family life. But work was where he could put his head down and get tasks done. In 6th grade he started working for his uncle’s cable company. He gave all of his earnings back to his mom to help with bills and groceries.

As Blaine got older he realized that there was one thing about school that really excited him – sports. He wasn’t always the most skilled and he rarely had all of the right gear, but he always outworked everyone on the team. Blaine excelled at basketball and football and was quickly noticed and encouraged by his coaches, teachers and the community.

During his freshman year in high school he made the varsity basketball team. It was a huge honor and Blaine could finally stick out for reasons beyond his socioeconomic status. But as he was gearing up for his first game, he realized that he wouldn’t be able to afford the pair of shoes that the rest of the team was wearing.

He was embarrassed, but tried to pretend like it wasn’t a big deal. The next day he opened his locker and found a pair of the team shoes in his locker.

Blaine said he still doesn’t know who put those shoes there. He has a few guesses, but no one ever admitted to the generous act of kindness.

Even though he doesn’t know the name of the person who gave him the shoes, Blaine said that’s a person he thinks about nearly every day. To most people it was just a pair of shoes, but to Blaine it was affirmation that someone cared about and believed in him.

After high school, Blaine attended Peru State College where he played football and studied physical education and sports management.

In high school, he hadn’t been a very good student – he did just enough to play football on Friday night – but in college that changed. He zoned in on both sports and school, making the most of his four years in college.

Blaine said he worked extra hard in college because he was paying his own way, and he knew he needed to get a good job after he graduated. He also said that being away from the constant chaos of his home life was a relief and he realized he didn’t want to move forward with the same kind of lifestyle that he grew up witnessing.

After graduation, Blaine stayed on at Peru as a football coach and fell in love with the idea of making coaching his career. He was offered a coaching position at a Division 1 university. It was his dream job, the perfect career move… but he turned it down.

While the job would have been great for Blaine, it wasn’t a good fit for him and his daughter. It would have put thousands of miles between them and a strain on their relationship. As someone who grew up without a dad, Blaine knew this wouldn’t work.

He finished up his coaching stint at Peru and then decided to start a roofing company. Growing up in a farm town, there was always roof work to be done and Blaine had started his own company back in high school. He decided to pick up where he left off, confident in the fact that he could provide a good service to the community.

Over the past few years, Blaine has seen his business grow alongside his daughter. He said he wouldn’t trade watching her grow up for anything. He’s built a thriving business that he hopes to expand to a handful of midwest states, and he isn’t shy about his ambitions and expectations for himself and his business.

Blaine is a highly confident and driven person. He’s a fanatic about doing good work and helping others. That’s not how he was raised, but it’s how he wants to raise his daughter.

When Blaine thinks back on his story he’s not as ashamed as he used to be about the way he grew up. He knows that his experiences shaped who is, but he’s more than just a product of his circumstances.

Blaine made his own choices in life. He chose to step up, to get out and to lean in when he was needed. He made mistakes, but he learned to take responsibility for his actions.

His story is about more than just his past, it’s about his future, a future he’s writing and one he’s proud to call his own.

June 21, 2017

Love6

Roxane McCoskey

By Asha Timperley

Roxane McCoskey has worn a lot of hats in her life. She’s been a stay at home mom, a work-from homer, an athletic director’s assistant, a farmers market vendor and now she’s a coffee shop owner.

Did we mention that Roxane didn’t even like coffee when she opened her coffee shop?

But Roxane didn’t get into the coffee business for the coffee, for her it was all about loveknots.

Loveknots are sweet knots of dough with a thick swipe of frosting on top. Every Christmas, Roxane’s mother-in-law made loveknots using a secret family recipe and the entire family devoured every last one. They often talked about how they should start a business selling them, because who could not love a loveknot?!

As years passed, Roxane tried her hand at making loveknots, but it wasn’t so easy. She had lots of failed attempts – years of failed attempts – until she finally got the recipe down and she became the official holiday loveknot maker.

But the question still remained, could they sell loveknots? Roxane and her family decided to test out their theory at the farmers market. They set up a table, laid out the loveknots and waited. Nothing happened.

“We didn’t realize that people didn’t know what loveknots were,” Roxane said. “But once we started putting out samples people would try it and immediately buy one.”

They sold 700-800 loveknots every weekend, oftentimes selling out an hour before the market ended. Then came the questions from their eager customers, ‘Where’s your shop?’ and ‘How can I buy more of these?’

So, Roxane and her husband started looking for retail space. However, they quickly realized that opening a shop that only sold loveknots might be difficult, so they decided to look for a coffee shop.

After scoping out their options around town they settled on a shop in the Piedmont Shopping Center and quickly went to work to make it their own. She and her husband originally named it Loveknot Coffee Shop as a way to stay connected with their farmers market customers, but they recently renamed it The Harbor.

Opening a coffee shop was a whole new kind of adventure for Roxane. Sure, she had mastered the loveknots, but running a business with employees and customers was an entirely new endeavor. Plus, she didn’t just want to be the owner of yet another coffee shop in town, she said, Lincoln has plenty of coffee shops but she wanted hers to be different.

And it was. After a few months of being in business, Roxane noticed their her clientele was different than most shops around town. She had regulars, lots of regulars who came with a few friends to drink coffee and chat for a few hours. And Roxane noticed that the majority of her customers were older.

At first, she wasn’t so sure about this. Was this the kind of vibe she wanted for her shop? But now, she said she wouldn’t change it.

Having a large population of older people who frequent her shop has made it a place where people talk with each other instead of avoid eye contact. It’s become a place that’s an extension of people’s homes and a part of their routine.

Her staff is the other thing that’s really shaped the culture at The Harbor. Roxane is very intentional when she hires employees, she looks for dedicated workers with strong people skills.

“I tell them, ‘I don’t want you just to work, I want you to like what you’re doing and build relationships,’ ” she said.

Roxane said it’s been fun to watch her employees build relationships with customers in their own ways. Some of them sit down and do a crossword puzzle with patrons, others offer a kind smile and friendly service, but they all have their own way of making people feel at home.

Walking into The Harbor feels like stopping by a small town coffee shop. There are old guys cracking jokes about birdwatching, the sweet smell of loveknots and coffee and families with their kids. It’s the kind of place that isn’t too concerned about having trendy drinks and decor, but is more focused on the quality and care they pour into each day they’re open.

A lot of the culture at The Harbor has developed on its own, but it’s also been heavily influenced by Roxane, and rightly so.

She’s the owner who started out not liking coffee, but now drinks a few cups a day. The baker who comes in late at night to make loveknots. And the boss who runs the show, but leaves the credit to her staff.

It’s Roxane’s small town upbringing and deep devotion to people that make The Harbor feel as safe and comfortable as the name suggests. Without her, The Harbor wouldn’t be the same.

That’s the thing, Roxane has poured a lot of her life into owning and running a coffee shop. But it seems like that’s what she does with just about anything she’s a part of – her faith, family, friendships, work, marriage. Her life has been about digging in and digging deep.

She’s been asked a few times recently about whether she’ll open another coffee shop and right now the answer is ‘No.’ It’s a nice idea, she said, and maybe even a good business move, but she wonders if it would dilute her passion for the work she does now.

Running a business is a lot of work, and she loves it, but it’s not her entire life and she doesn’t want it to be. She wants to invest well in her staff and customers, prioritize her faith and her marriage and enjoy being a grandmother. These are the things she wants her story to be about, these things, and loveknots.

March 15, 2017

Love8